Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Sinking Even Lower Into Domestication

Hey. I have some news, if ya cares one bit.

  1. I was in the hospital for ever because my right kidney, it done took a nap. Painfully. Let me tell you one thing that saved me: IV injections every 2 hours for more than a week of...yes folks...straight up Morphine. Thank you Jesus.
  2. When I got out of the hospital, I realized for the first time that we're a one car family because of the turd ex husband who decided he wanted me to give my brand new Altima back. No worries. I just spent $26,955 yesterday for funsies on a new Honda Odyssey. Leather seats, A/C to all 7 seats individually, DVD player, 12 disk changer on the CD player, magic doors (!) etc. etc. etc. Feels good to be so family like. Oh damn! I'm almost as good as Britney, ya'll!
  3. My hair is curly curly today, and very blonde, and when I'm looking at myself in the window in my office that shows me from my waist up, I look totally hot with my pregnant cleavage and big ass blonde hair. Man, I'm hot today...til I stand up to reveal the basketball under my shirt. Unless you're one of those people who think pregnant women are sexy. In that case...heeeeeeeeeyyyy...

K, what else? Hmm, I guess that's all. I'm tired and I need a coke, but thats about it for now.


Over and out.

5 comments:

shark like a fox said...

plz tell me the Honda is in YOUR name....

Alli said...

fortunately...yes. Mine. All mine. I could have put it in mine AND Mike's, but I just got it in my name. I'll add him later, it was less paperwork to just do it myself.

indygirl said...

M m m m orphine!

John Q. Public esq. said...

and yes i
i am one of those men...

Alli said...

I knew you were, darlin. I just KNEW it.